I am not really one for deep, philosophical bloggertry (yep, made that up). It has come to my attention that the internet is awash with people, quite rightly making lists of things they want to do, achieve, see in 2012.
I kind of jumped on the bandwagon in my last post with the whole ‘Letter to the Universe’ thing, but one of the things I intend to do in the next twelve months is to notice and in some cases stop noticing the little things. By this, I mean focus on the little things that actually matter; for example when someone contacts you out of the blue via a text, email or if you are really lucky, letter….take note of the fact that despite the fact that person probably has a load in the machine they need to hang out to dry, some washing up to do, errands to run and needs to find time to put petrol in the car, they stopped and thought about you enough to wonder how you are and actually find out. On reflection that is actually really rather nice as we all live in a certain type of chaos and to be on someone’s list is pretty special indeed. Not just that, but I am really intent on opening my eyes and storing to memory as many of the small moments which are actually very important. we rush around constantly missing wonderful things (yes, little bit OTT with the emotion today but if you don’t like it just stop reading!).
A prime example of this was this morning when I came downstairs after getting dressed and my little boy (not even two) just looked at me with his incredible smiling face and said “Pretty, mummy”. This is a total memory bank moment. Forget female insecurities, the fact I had twenty outfits on the bedroom floor after sulking in the view of my reflection, because ultimately all that matters from this scenario is that I have a beautiful child and in his eyes I look pretty, that’s good enough for me!
As well as storing the positives, making sure I take in all the best bits along the way I feel 2012 is the year I must, for my own sanity learn to leave the small, unimportant things alone. I am a born worrier, to an unhealthy degree. I feel guilty for hours if I walk past a charity person in the street with a clipboard. If I have to cancel plans through illness I will worry more about the implications of letting someone down than the implications to my health of going out in the bleak midwinter when ill. It is destructive behaviour and although I am glad I am the sort of person that cares about others I must learn to care a little bit more about myself too.
Soo…..rambling over for today. Here is my 2012 to do list:
– Notice the good little things more/be more grateful
– Ignore the silly little guilt feeling I get for ridiculous reasons!
– Write more (book number two still on page one pause due to lack of focus, tut!)
– Enter as many writing competitions as possible (someone has to win)
– Relax more
– Eat less sugar (we enjoy much too close a relationship for my health, weight and teeth!)
– Listen to more music
– Make time to see my wonderful friends more